What Cletus Taught Me

All things come from Thee, Oh Lord. The earth is Yours, and all that is in it. I am not my own, but Yours. Children are a gift from You, as are all things. You give me the joy of caring for Your gifts, and while I call my children mine, I know that I am just a steward of them. Like a king who returns unexpectedly, sometimes I must give things back to You before I am ready.

All life is Yours. You have measured the days of all people before the world began. Some days are shorter than others. For Piper, I pray her days are long and full of joy. For Cletus, I thank You for the six short weeks You gave us.

Nothing is mine that I claim is mine. I am the one who gives birth. I am the one who feeds, clothes, cares for, and nurtures, but my children are not mine, just as I am not mine. You, Oh Lord, are my King. You are the One who blesses. You are the One who gives life. You number our days, and those who breathe You know the breaths. You are the One who feeds with the Bread of Life. You are the One who clothes in garments we can not yet see. You are the One who cares for us, provides for us, and loves us beyond our understanding.

My children are not my own. You allow me to love and care for just a little. What You give You can also take away because it is Yours. While it hurts to know that I will never know my second child on this earth, I will praise You for him. I will remember that he is Yours, has always been Yours, and will always be Yours.

I am a steward. I am not the king. I will always be the steward. I will never be the king. I will honor and serve. I will love and protect. I will sing Your praises and rely on Your comfort. I will remember the blessings You have given me. I will always be a mother of Piper and Cletus. I will hold the beautiful daughter You have given me in my arms with great joy. I will remember my child that I can not hold in my heart with great joy.

Tears may fall from my eyes. My heart may be heavy for a little while, but I will praise You. There is a time and a place for everything under the sun. Sleep well in our Father's arms, little one.